Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Holy sore nipples Batman
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
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