Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
