btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Randomize