Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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