I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize
