I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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