Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
