Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
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