yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
