ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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