i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
BRING THE BAGELS
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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