im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Randomize