I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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