So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
Randomize
