Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
