Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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