Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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