She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
im drinking this country out of the recession.
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
