are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
