His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
