I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Randomize
