how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
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