I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
