oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
