yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
