as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
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