Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
