so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize
