he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
time to smoke my breakfast
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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