i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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