so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Come see our sink grown plant.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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