I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future�
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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