Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
