her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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