At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
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