i think my tv is drunk
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Randomize
