i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
He shit in the fireplace
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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