Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
