Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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