Whoa Z and x make the same sound
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
