..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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