we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
