Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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