He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Randomize
