i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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