he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
