I cannot find my penis.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Randomize
