been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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