Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
