my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
