Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Randomize
