ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
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